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Thursday, August 2, 2012

The Hurricane

I believe it's hurricane season for Kadyn right now. We were in the eye of the storm a few weeks ago and now all hell (for better or lack of word) has broke loose. Kadyn is really sick right now. He has spent a great deal of time seizing, screaming, and thrashing about his bed. Hitting his head, hitting his shunt and being miserable. Morphine has been his best friend. This storm has an ending, when? I am hoping tomorrow. I am hoping NSG will see how miserable Kadyn was throughout the night and go from there. There is only one way of finding out what is going on, and that is by entering into Kadyn's brain and seeing what is going on.

Mommy wants her Kadyn back. She wants to see him smile, hear his words and listen to him yell. She wants her happy Kadyn back. Where have you gone Happy Kadyn? It's been so long since you've appeared to me. We have good days, but the bad seem to happen more. This hospital is starting to feel more like home, then being at home does. Isn't that a sad thing? I know with some sandbags and shelter we will make it through this hurricane. We will come out stronger than before, as you always do my love. Soon the sunshine will be out again, and your smile will be brighter than before. Like a car, shunts break down. It's hard to diagnose a  shunt failure when you my love don't show the exact signs. Although shunt revisions are brain surgery, it's a quick easy fix and you're back on the road to recovery. My handsome prince. I want you to feel better.

Shunt's are awesome, a shunt is what keeps the pressure off Kadyn's brain. Shunt's are not fool proof and most of them are not forever. There are a few lucky ones who have had 1 or 2 revisions, but most face dozens even hundreds of shunt malfunctions. The fact is, everyone says they hate the shunt, I have even guilty of that. Why I only hate when they do not work, but the fact is, the shunt keeps my son happy. The shunt keeps his brain from pressure. The shunt does in fact keep my son alive. I think everyone with hydrocephalus should be thankful of their shunt because without it, their life would no where be near what it is now.

So here we sit in the hospital, waiting to see what morning brings up, well afternoon I guess, it's already 6am. I have no slept since before work Tuesday. I am exhausted, but I have no choice but to ride this out along with Kadyn. This will only last for so long and then I'll be able to sleep again. Or like the old saying goes, I'll sleep when I'm dead.

Kadyn after 20 minutes of thrashing, screaming and hitting his head and shunt

Hopefully the afternoon/mid morning brings us answers. Hopefully Kadyn can fall asleep and get some good rest. He is not suppose to have anything to eat or drink, but I did give him some of his milk (2 ounces) to calm him down a bit and it's seem to work along with the morphine. Once he falls asleep things will be good for a bit. Hopefully I can get a bit of rest too.


Anonymous said...

My name is Kayla and I also suffer with Hydrocephalus. While researching Hydro tonight, I stumbled upon your blog about Kayden. My heart goes out to you... I will continue to keep you and Kayden in my daily prayers. I truly hope things get better for you both. One of my favorite quotes that brings me comfort when I am in the hospital is, "Sometimes God calms the storm, and other times, God lets the storms rage and calms his child." We don't know why things happen, but please know that Kayden's story has touched me. He truly is a "Hydro Hero."